Thursday, November 30, 2006

Hot Green Alien Slave Babes in Our Future?

Stephen Hawking, world-renowned physicist, author, and most recognizable genius in a wheelchair, says, "YES!"

Promoting his new book, Jane, Get Me Off This Crazy Planet, Hawking says we humans need to develop Star Trek-esque warp drive engines and populate other planets as fast as possible before life on Earth is snuffed out by an asteroid, nuclear war, or a cannibalistic eating contest between Oprah Winfrey and Joy Behar of The View.

When asked if "adopting Star Trek technology" means that we'll gradually evolve into many different planetary races and species, and if that means we'll eventually breed a race of subservient hot green love slaves who live to dance erotically and satisfy our every whim, Hawking responded, "IT WOULD BE IMPERATIVE. OWNING ONE OF THOSE GREEN CHICKS WOULD BE THE PINNACLE OF HUMAN SCIENTIFIC ACHIEVEMENT."

Similar news:
Sir Richard Branson plans to make space travel available to the masses in the year 2008, and in the process will make enough money to buy three more islands in the Caribbean.
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) say they have a faster, more economical way to achieve interplanetary population. All you have to do is join their church, marry, have lots of kids then die. Bingo. You and your wife get to play Adam and Eve on your very own planet! Plus, no warp speed jet lag.


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