Norton Bears All, Then Resigns

Is Gale Norton's husband hung like a bear? Only she knows for sure. But based on her Mona Lisa-esque smile (see photo) and the fact that she's resigning her post as Interior Secretary to move back to the Rockies for some "comparative analysis" with her hubby, the staff here at Turner/Phelps is betting, "yes."

Good-bye, Gale. Hopefully your ties to Abramoff, questionable lobbyist money, and penchant for destroying our untouched wilderness won't come back to screw you like Grizzly Norton after drinking a twelve-pack of Coors and watching Brokeback Mountain (for the third time).

When the federal prosecutors come calling, just close your eyes and power through it.