Friday, December 30, 2005

The Big Questions for 2006

Will Gwen Stefani follow suit with the rest of Hollywood and use the birth of her baby as a cover for getting a boob job? Bigger return, no doubt, for Gwen's teenage male fans (and Phelps).

Will President Bush shake things up at the Whitehouse with a reorg? Unlikely. His cadre of yes-men, strong-arms and ass-kissers have served him well, kept his neo-con agenda on track, and spun a web of deceit too sticky for anyone to escape, short of having a massive stroke (Cheney, May '06) or a sex-change operation (Rumsfeld, Aug. '07).

Will Dave Navarro's face actually collapse under the weight of his make-up in his attempt to wear more cosmetics than his wife, Carmen Electra? Hopefully.

Will the government-prescribed teaching of Intelligent Design gain a foothold across America and cement our position as "Most idiotic of industrialized nations"? Probably. It's hard to imagine us not already having that statuette on our mantel (damn you, Kerblekistan!)


Post a Comment

<< Home

Site Meter