Friday, January 07, 2005

The Honda War Eagle!

So, I was riding into work yesterday and I found myself at a red light behind this lady singing to herself in a Honda CR-V with a W '04 sticker on the back window and license plate that sounded-out "War Eagle." I won't print the exact plate number, to protect this woman from you unscrupulous types out there, but it was plain enough to guess. First, I thought War Eagles drove American cars? Am I wrong about this?
Well, it was a long traffic light and I entertained myself by reading her lips in her rearview mirror. (It's an old parlor trick I learned in my years as a volunteer missionary on Molochai Island at the leper colony. Reading lips is common among the lepers... when the ears fall off you have to move to sign language, but once the fingers go, it's all lip-reading, baby, or a pretty hard-to-understand dinner conversation.)
Sure enough, she WAS a war eagle. She was singing the War Eagle anthem. The part I caught before the light turned green went something like this:
Neo-cons and Old-school Rights
Don't need reasons to start fights
We'll find a way to shirk the biiiilllll...
We just want to kill kill kill.

Kill kill kill...
Kill kill kill...
We just want to
Kill kill kill.

Left-wingers won't protect us.
We should put them on a bus.
We're the ones who have the wiiillll...
To stand up tall and kill kill kill.

Kill kill kill...
Kill kill kill...
Teach the children
Kill kill kill.
Needless to say, I put plenty of room between the War Eagle Honda and my pickup truck. Wouldn't want to be on the losing end of a case of road rage, there.

2 Comments:

Blogger God of History said...

Check the Honda website. I think all Jap automakers manufacture, or at least assemble the components, in the good old US of A. Even if their profits all go to a single individual in Japan (remember - those yellow mon**ys never did pay reparations for bombing Pearl Harbor or killing American POWs in Hiroshima). At least in some aspect they are contributing to the American economy by putting people to work scrapeing Gore/Fienstine (or was it Daschel/Kennedy) bumper stickers from used miniture automobiles crushed by giant, gas hog, SUVs and SUTs.

By the way, don't you drive one of those oversized 4x4s, with a monster engine? Or have I deceived myself?

11:32 PM  
Blogger Phelps said...

Yellow Mon**ys, God of Thunder?
Whatever could you mean?

Yellow monDAys? Are they anything like blue Mondays? Or is that when you drink too much green tea Sunday evening and wake up the next morning in a puddle of your own shame?

And as for my choice in gas-guzzling vehicles... it's my contribution to alternative energies. The sooner we use up the fossil fuels, the sooner we can focus our collective attention on a cleaner, more efficient energy source.

2:39 PM  

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