Thunder on the Highway

A phonecall last night went like this:
RING
Thom: Hello?
The God of Thunder: Listen-up, you tree-hugging, homeless-feeding, gunless, Godless, murderer-sparing, commie, Marxist, left-leaning, tofu-eating, meditating, yoga-stretching, screen-writing liberal. I just drove from Texas to Colorado, crossed three state lines, and didn't have to stop once. Do you know how I did that?
Thom: Ummm... adult diapers? Some kind of stool-stiffener maybe?
TGoT: No! I didn't have to stop once in over 1200 miles because we live in a FREE COUNTRY. I didn't have to show my "papers" and didn't have to bribe any corrupt border guards. And do you know why it's a free country?
Thom: Ummm... the constitution written by our founding fathers?
TGoT: NO! It's because George Bush and Ronald Reagan made it free. They brought down the Soviet empire, they kept the wolves of Communism at bay, and they are keeping our interstate highways free of terrorists!
Thom: Ummm... Reagan's dead. Are you on any psychotropic drugs?
TGoT: Of course I am. How do you think I drove 1200 miles without stopping? I've still got 800 more miles to go.
Thom: Okay, Rush, you have a safe drive.
CLICK