Farrakhan's Speech to be Ignored by Mainstream Media and Other White Devils

Having laid low for the past several years, Louis Farrakhan, the leader of the Nation of Islam, has come out of seclusion by organizing an "I'm Still Here" convention to be held this coming Sunday at the Cobo Center in Detroit.

Motivated by the sudden realization that he might die without having ever said anything nice about anybody, Farrakhan plans to promote hope, peace, and love, among other things, in his keynote speech. Also on the convention agenda:

Saturday 9:00 AM to 10:30 AM
How to Tell if Your Boss is a Bloodsucking Jew

Saturday 11:00 AM to 12:15 PM
So You Think the Pope's a No Good Cracker? I Agree

Saturday 1:00 PM to 2:00 PM
Practical Bowtie Knots and Other Fashion Tips

Major media news outlets plan to ignore the conference altogether, airing instead breaking news about Anna Nicole Smith's continued deadness, red carpet preparations for The Oscars, and commentary on whether or not Paula Abdul will make it through the whole season on American Idol.