Throw Him on a Cheeseburger; Gonzales in a Pickle

Alberto Gonzales has been heard singing an old favorite from the Clash as he wanders the Halls of Justice. "Should I stay or should I go? If I leave there will be trouble... but if I stay it will be double. So come on and let me knoooow. Should I stay or should I go?"

I've been praying with him on this subject. I want him to go, but at the same time I fear the consequences of him leaving. Who will replace him? Will he become a partner at some international law firm and do more damage in the private sector than he could ever do in the government?

Everybody in Bush's remaining inner circle (Cheney, Rice, Rove, and Gonzales) has an ace in the hole, the golden parachute for all presidential cronies, the Presidential Pardon. Like Nixon said to Ford, "Jerry, we have to protect those who've protected us. And I protected your sorry Michigan ass while you cooked the books on the Warren Report. So roll out that pardon for ol' Dickey." (You can expect one December 2007 for Scooter Libby, among others. Mark my words.) Maybe he'll stick around with that promise of clemency from George the Benevolent, or he'll leave and hope George doesn't feel abandoned.

Here's the dilemma. What do you think, should he stay or should he go?

Gonzales Don't Go. If you stay in office as the attorney general, take your lumps from congress, and keep doing the job we all know you're suited for, then we know where you are and can keep and eye on you. You won't slip into the slime-covered alleys of international private enterprise or agencies (can you say Paul Wolfowitz?) to increase intolerance toward the impoverished in third world countries or spread discord to stimulate growth of the military-industrial complex.

Go, Alberto, Go. Be a man. Hang your head in shame and march back to San Antonio. When the subpeonas start arriving from Congress to testify about your involvement in all the nasty, dirty, underhanded cases involving your patron, Saint George, plead the fifth, practice the mantra, "I don't recall," and pray for that presidential pardon. In the end, this is where you'll be regardless, but this way you'll have left office on your own terms.